May 25, 2020

Mindful Communication

Posted in: Uncategorized

6 tips to protect your love during quarantine..


So, somebody said they heard that this lockdown has been really hard on relationships.

According to research posted in Forbes Magazine, only 18% Are Satisfied With Their Communication During Coronavirus Pandemic.

The sudden change brought about by quarantine conditions is tough on courtships and marriages. Being in constant close quarters with your loved ones can be an eye opener or an overload if you aren’t used to it.

If you’ve been experiencing more quarrells, misunderstandings and side eyes, using mindful communication can be a lifesaver for both your personal development and your relationship.

1.) Location, Location, Location

Road map your emotions in your body
  • As soon as the issue between you and your loved one triggers you, before speaking, locate where the most intense sensation of emotion is building up in your body.
  • Some people notice that they feel a ball of tightness in their stomach. Others notice a surge of heat move through their body, head or hands. Eyebrows may furrow and shoulders tighten. I’ve also had persons tell me they began shaking in intense situations. What is most important in those instances, is to:
  1. TUNE IN TO THE SENSATION! Be curious about it. – What does it feel like? What is it doing? How intense is it? What part of your body is it in? Etc..
  • Breathe into it and notice the thoughts that it brought with it. The ability to notice your own thoughts and allow them is POWERFUL. Simply label them as they pass. E.g instead of “I want to shove him and break this glass” just label the thought as “Angry” and “Violent”. Or if the thought is “she didnt wash the dishes again after 3 days” label it as “Disappointed” and “Frustrated” ….etc..
Be curious about your emotions

2.)Once youve used this strategy to hijack your brain centers for more objective reasoning, You can name the emotion for your partner.

E.g. “Babe…I feel really disappointed and frustrated because these dishes are still here. ” or “Hun, I feel extremely angry and violent right now. I need to…….or It would be great if you….”

3.)Magic Touch

Touch is a magical way to bring your attention to the present experience and communicate intimacy to your partner even when you’re not so happy with them.

Try this: As you are naming your emotion to your partner, touch them on the arm, chest or hand while you say it. It says: Im not happy about this right now but I love you. Your partner is more likely to want to communicate with you and empathize with your experience.

Get present with touch and communicate intimacy

4.)Isolate

When we are in close quarters with another individual for an extended period of time, lines become blurred. You can become so immersed in their experience – what they’re doing, what they’re watching, what they’re saying..that you forget to tune in to yourself as much as you would having more time apart.

Try this: Schedule time in the morning to meditate or do mindful movement (yoga, exercise, etc) alone. Take a walk in your garden, pull up some weeds, drink your tea on the back porch, etc. Throughout the day keep yourself on a schedule of your own goals, training your brain to be keyed into your own experience.

  • Make intentional moments through the day where you text your mate, (Yes, that one in the same house with you.) While youre doing your own thing. Seek them out and pinch their butt or be mischevious, give them a kiss, or a compliment and then return to your own schedule before retiring to them that evening.
Create your own space. Create your own world.

5.) Empathize.

Last but not least, when you and your partner become frustrated, remove your personal feelings from the equation and try to see things from their perspective. Allow yourself to feel kindness and empathy for them and then choose your response.

6.) Apologize genuinely

It’s really difficult to apologize when egos go head to head, but naming your partners emotion, in your apology can break down so many walls.

1.) Name it

2.)acknowledge your part

3.) Ask for support

Example: It seems like you were disappointed and frustrated when I forgot to fold the laundry and watched my show all day. Im going to work at doing much better at that. If you can help me remember, Id like that too.

Dont forget to subscribe and share the blog! Namaste

I’d love to hear how trying Mindful Communication tips work for you. Feel free to follow me on instagram at @Star_inspired and send a message at any time for one on one assistance.

https://www.instagram/star_inspired

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  1. Lakeria says:

    Wow 18% I asked myself why even be with someone you don’t want to come home to or communicate with, but reading this I can see what leads to resentment and miscommunication. Love this! Great Read!

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